Perspective: Family Strengths
Problem child. Deadbeat dad. Welfare mother. Dysfunctional family. Negative labels are the everyday lingo about families, yet sour words do more to 'box in' than to 'free up' the subjects, as well as the purveyors of such gossip. Seeing a good side, something an individual, family, or community is doing right, encourages a person to learn, care, and contribute what he can. It all begins with an attitude, reflected in a quote by Mother Theresa:
"If you judge people you don't have time to love them."
Half empty? Half full. Youth leaders, Head Start teachers, counselors, and social workers who look for assets and build upon them often create a self-fulfilling prophecy:
"Believe the best, work for the best, and you get the best."
Extension Family Life is committed to building strengths of families, through research-based training and educational materials for pro- fessionals and families. Family strengths identified by researchers in the past two decades include:
Commitment, Appreciation, Communication, Time Together, Faith and Values, Stress-coping skills (Nick Stinnett & John DeFrain, 1985, Secrets of Strong Families, Boston: Little-Brown)
Promotion of Self-Worth; Open Communication; Clear Rules and Expectations; Connections to the Wider Society (Virginia Satir, 1972, Peoplemaking, Palo Alto, CA: Science & Behavior Books)
Affiliative vs. Oppositional Attitudes; Respect for Self, Others; Open Communication; Firm Parental Coalition; Tolerance vs. Controlling Orientation; Spontaneity vs. Rigid and Stereotyped Interactions; Initiative vs. Passivity; Encouragement of Uniqueness (Lewis, Jerry M.; W. Robert Beavers; John T. Gossett; & Virginia Austin Phillips, 1976, No Single Thread: Psychological Health in Family Systems, New York: Brunner-Mazel.)
Identity Processes (mutuality vs. individuation vs. isolation); Change (flexibility vs rigidity, stability vs. disorganization); Information Processing (clear vs. unclear perception and communication); Role Structuring (role reciprocity vs confusion, clear vs. diffuse generational boundaries) Barnhill (1979)
Configuration (worldview), Coordination (joint problem solving), Closure (solution-seeking) (David Reiss, 1981, The Family's Construction of Reality, Cambridge, MA: Harvard Univ. Press)
Communication and Listening; Affirming and Supporting; Respecting Others; Trusting; Play and Humor; Shared Responsibility; Moral Teaching; Rituals and Traditions; Balance of Interaction; Shared Religious Core; Respect for Privacy; Service to Others; Table Time Conversation; Shared Leisure; Help-seeking (Dolores Curran, 1983, Traits of a Healthy Family, New York: Ballantine)
Cohesion, Adaptability, Communication (David H. Olson, Candyce S. Russell, & Douglas H. Sprenkle, 1989, Circulmplex Model: Systemic Assessment and Treatment of Families, New York: Haworth Press)
Spirituality, Knowledge/Education, Entrepreneurship, Patriotism, Self-help, Building Community, Reaching Out to Others (Andrew Billingsley, 1993, Family values reconsidered. Address to Annual Conference of the National Council on Family Relations, Baltimore, MD, November 12)
Connectedness and Commitment; Respect for Differences; Couple Respect and Equity; Effective Parent Leadership for Nurture, Guidance, and Protection; Organizational Stability/Interactive Consistency; Adaptability to Stress; Open Communication; Effective Problem-Solving and Conflict Resolution; Shared Beliefs Promoting Trust, Continuity, Concern for Others; Adequate Economic and Social Resources/Supports (Froma Walsh (Ed.), 1993, Normal Family Processes, New York: Guilford)
Roosa (1993) summarized evidence for the contributions of strong families to resiliency in children and youth:
1) Positive relationships with at least one competent, supportive adult or parent, who is not overly critical; 2) High cohesion and warmth, with an absence of discord; 3) Parenting characterized by clarity, vigilence, and warmth; 4) Teaching of children to be good learners and problem-solvers;
5) Teaching of effective social skills which make children engaging to others; 6) Transmission of other competencies valued by society; 7) Facilitation of a strong sense of self-efficacy in children.
